Monday, October 29, 2007

I Ain’t Voting Anymore.

I never thought I’d say this, but I’ve decided to finally join the real majority of my American brethren…the ones who don’t vote. I’ve decided that I ain’t gonna vote no more. No way, no how, period.

My first introduction to this idea came from the great funny man George Carlin. Ten years ago, when I heard his wonderful Back In Town album, I was kinda shocked to hear the only comedian I truly idealized say he favored not voting. This, of course, was in 1996. I was an young and idealistic adult and I eagerly waited to cast my first vote ever in my life.

I knew Bill Clinton was useless, and he royally pissed me off by being the cowardly spineless Democrat he was, but I figured he had to be better than Bob Dole. I stood in that voting booth for a long, long time, looking at Clinton’s name. Finally, I said to myself, “fuck this asshole,” and voted for Ross Perot instead. Why did I vote for Perot? Just so I could flip the bird to Clinton.

Then we got Bush. I gleefully supported Nader over Gore, and I never apologized for it. Even after these 7 long nightmarish years of Bush, I still don’t regret it. You know why? Because Nader didn’t cost Gore shit. Hell, if Gore had bothered to run as a candidate for the Presidency instead as a spineless worm to replace another spineless worm who got a blowjob, then maybe he would have gotten enough votes in Florida that would have made it harder for the Supreme Court to steal the election.

Then came Kerry. I would have loved to have voted for someone like Dean. Really, I was holding out for Kucinich. Of course, that didn’t matter because we got Kerry, thanks to the right wing attacks on Dean. And like Gore, Kerry would have won in Ohio if he’d had enough spine to say, “yo, stop stealing the election in Ohio.”

Then came 2006, where every progressive in the country worked their asses off to get a Democratic Congress. I was one of them. We put in long hours and lots of money to get two things: an end to the war and Bush impeached. A year later what have we gotten? We get spineless cowards like Pete Stark apologizing to Bush for telling the truth.

I could blame the Republicans and their supporters for being nutcases and jackasses who are ruining the country. But that’s like blaming a snake for biting you. I could blame the Democrats in Congress for being cowards, but that’s like blaming worms for being invertebrates. The reality is that the politicians are just puppets. Dangling like marionettes for all to see. Meanwhile, everyone ignores the puppeteers, best known as The Fortune 500.

So I’m done with the great American Illusion. I’m staying home on election day. When Americans are ready to do something about the puppeteers, let me know. I’ll bring a rifle.